Irwin: Hi. This is Irwin. I can't come to the phone right now. I'm in...indisposed. But you can leave a message at the beep.

Billy: Irwin, are you there? It's me, Billy. If you're there, pick up the phone. Answer the phone, Irwin! I know you're there! Irwin? Irwin! I bet you're not indisposed at all, Irwin. I bet you're just sitting on the... Guess he's not there. Mom, will you fix me a jelly sandwich... with peanut butter and pickles and fish sticks... and some of those little wieners and ketchup... and baloney and bananas and tofu... and tuna and pig knuckles and... Mom? Mom? Where are you? A sandwich here! Strange. First Irwin is missing, now mom. You in there, mom? Maybe the whole world has been abducted by aliens... 'cept me! I wonder if they got dad. Dad? Are you in the garage? Hey, daddio? Where are you? Davd, I'm playing with the power tools. OK, thanks. WHERE IS EVERYBODY!?

Grim: What's the ruckus?

Billy: Grim! What are you doing on the roof?

Grim: I'm bleaching my bones, man. Dig my pearly whites.

One coconut fizz.

Grim: Marvelous. Thank you.

My pressure, your lowness.

Billy: Grim! Have you been playing with your sickle again? Where's mom?

Gladys: No more cookies, Billy.

Billy: And dad?

Harold: Leave your mitts off my tower pools.

Billy: And my best friend Irwin?

Irwin: Stop calling me, you dweeb.

Billy: That's it! I'm too late! Stupid Irwin.

Grim: Billy, I never touched your parents.

Billy: But if it wasn't you, then who?

Grim & Billy: MANDY!?

Mandy: Hanging out in the alley. Figures. Excuse me. Must have been something I ate. Girls burp, which reminds me... I'm having you for dinner today, Billy. Be there at 6:00. You too, bonehead.

Billy: Now I know where everyone went. Mandy ate 'em for breakfast... and she wants me for dinner!

Grim: Yep. Seen this before. I wonder what she had in that box.

Billy: Probably a head! She's saving it for dessert! What am I going to do?

Grim: Slow down, Billy. Let's not jump to conclusions. First, you need proof.

Billy: Right. The smoking glove. Come on, Grim. Grim!

Grim: Shhhh...

Billy: Look what I found in Mandy's trash. Bones! And they're all yucky and covered with ants.

Grim: Those are chicken bones, you simp.

Billy: How do you know? Trust me. I know my bones.

Grim: Over here. Billy, get up.

Billy: She ate his brains!

Grim: Let's get out of here.

Billy: Hey, Grim, what's with all the weird tiki crud?

Grim: Looks like some sort of South Sea soiree.

Billy: What's that mean?

Grim: Bunch of cannibals throw a party to eat the neighbors. Quick, hide in those bushes! Careful with that sickle.

Time to throw the shrimp on the barbie.


Grim: You are definitely on the menu. It's Mandy and she's got the box. Billy!

Billy: Mandy!

Mandy: Billy, just on time.

Billy: Whose head is in the box, you cannibal?

Mandy: Head?

Billy: It's a chocolate cake!

All: Surprise! Happy birthday, Billy!

Harold: It's a birthday tiki party/luau thing, son.

Billy: Mom, dad, and all my friends... you weren't eaten after all! Except...Where's Irwin?

Mandy: Irwin's glasses. How do you suppose these got in there?

Community content is available under CC-BY-SA unless otherwise noted.